Want a competitive advantage in sales? Understand when your buyers are “in my feels”. Buying is emotional. We all know this. Your buyers often come from a place of fear of making a bad buying decision. It’s also a good reminder that selling also is emotional. More importantly, recognize when you yourself are “in my feels”. As a seller you might be afraid of not closing the deal because your job, business and life depend on it. Both parties have their own personal agendas – to ultimately be successful, look like a rockstar and FEEL amazing.
As in any type of relationship there has to be give and take. Like a dance, someone is leading and someone is following. As the seller, you will lead the buyer on a journey but if you forget to let the buyer do some of the leading, you will step on toes and the dance will be painfully over.
So, how do you become a better dancer is this emotional relationship?
Simple. Increase your emotional intelligence (EQ) – the ability to identify and manage one’s own emotions, as well as the emotions of others. This first requires self-awareness of one’s triggers as well as being able to self-empathize. The more self-aware you are, the better you will become at social awareness of others to recognize their emotional reactions and needs.
How do you get better at emotional intelligence?
Continue to work on self-awareness and self-empathy and then start working on your ability to actively listen to and sincerely be curious about others. Before shoving your product or service down your prospects’ throats, take the time to have real conversations with them beyond the generalities of their businesses and your products and services. Find common ground and create a connection. Learn what inspires and worries them. Be a supportive friend to cheer them on and listen to their problems.
And remember, most everyone has a need to be loved, no matter the type of relationship. Dance your way into their hearts and all parties will profit.
Another great way to improve your emotional intelligence is through improv-based training which re-trains the brain to be more human again through active listening, observation, validation and collaboration skills – everything improv performers do to connect with each other on stage and with their audience. Check out our video series Spontaneous Selling 1.0 to learn more.
Some great books to check out to help you:
- Sales EQ by Jeb Blount
- Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves
Other Resources
- The Pivotal Leader Podcast – featuring interviews with thought leaders and CEOs
- Women Your Mother Warned You About Podcast – featuring topics for women in sales and business
