As I sat observing a leadership team discuss their challenges, I could see the familiar struggle in their eyes – that delicate balancing act we all face. On one hand, they needed to drive performance and hold their teams accountable. On the other hand, they wanted to show empathy, avoid micromanaging, and maintain positive relationships. Sound familiar? If you’re leading a sales team, or any team for that matter, you’ve likely experienced this tension.
Your high performers want exceptions but making them creates resentment. Team members claim they’re too busy for training but somehow find time for networking events with questionable ROI. You invest in development programs only to watch the lessons evaporate without application. And through it all, you’re trying to figure out how to be firm without being harsh, supportive without being soft.
In a recent group coaching session with a leadership team, we confronted these exact challenges and uncovered several powerful insights about creating accountability and driving performance. I’m sharing these lessons because I know the struggle is real, and because the solutions we discovered might be exactly what you need right now.
Set Clear Expectations
One of the most powerful lessons from our leadership discussion is the importance of setting clear expectations. When we fail to define exactly what success looks like, team members create their own definitions, which may not align with organizational goals.
Throughout our conversation, we discovered how misunderstandings about time commitments, scheduling requirements, and priorities created unnecessary friction. Team members would routinely miss training or attempt to reschedule at the last minute, often citing client needs as justification. This pattern revealed not just poor planning, but a fundamental misalignment about what matters.
What became clear is that when leaders don’t explicitly communicate expectations, team members fill in the gaps with their own assumptions. Training gets perceived as optional rather than essential, scheduling becomes reactive rather than proactive, and short-term client demands consistently override long-term development needs.
Several leaders acknowledged how they had assumed their team members knew how to manage their time effectively or prioritize activities, only to discover this wasn’t the case. As one leader noted, “I think I’ve made some assumptions even with my sales team… thinking that they know how to manage their time, and they know where to spend their time productively.” This honest realization was an example of his self-awareness and willingness to improve as a leader.
What Leaders Can Do:
To move from assumption to alignment, leaders must translate expectations into tangible actions. Here are a few ways to make clarity a consistent leadership habit:
- Document and communicate specific expectations for training completion, including deadlines
- Create a calendar visualization showing when training should be completed
- Discuss potential scheduling conflicts proactively rather than reactively
- Clarify the “why” behind requirements, not just the “what”
The Danger of Managing by Exception & Giving Passes
A significant insight was the recognition of “managing by exception” – creating special rules for high performers that undermine consistency. One leader shared “we manage by exception with high performers.”
This pattern emerges subtly. A top salesperson misses a scheduled training session but isn’t held accountable because “they’re already hitting their numbers.” A high performer skips a required session but faces no consequences because “they bring in the most revenue.” While these accommodations might seem harmless in isolation, they send powerful signals throughout the organization.
The impact goes far beyond the immediate situation. When standards apply differently across the team, it erodes the foundation of trust needed for effective leadership. Team members quickly identify who is subject to the rules and who isn’t. Even though it’s rarely discussed openly with leadership, these observations shape perceptions about fairness and commitment to stated values.
More concerning is how this inconsistency affects mid-level performers. These team members, who often represent the largest segment of your organization, become less engaged when they perceive inequity. They begin questioning why they should maintain high standards when others receive passes. Over time, this resentment can lead to decreased effort, disengagement, and ultimately, attrition.
Perhaps most damaging is the effect on your high performers themselves. By exempting them from expectations that apply to others, we unintentionally send the message that their contribution is limited to individual results rather than organizational impact. We rob them of the opportunity to elevate the entire team through their example and influence.
During my leadership coaching session with them I put an uncomfortable stake in the ground, “Everybody sees it, and they’re all talking about it behind your backs.”
What Leaders Can Do:
Addressing inconsistency starts with acknowledging its ripple effect on culture and trust. To lead with fairness and transparency, consider these strategies:
- Establish clear, fair policies that apply to everyone regardless of performance level
- When exceptions must be made, communicate the reasoning transparently
- Recognize high performers in ways that don’t undermine organizational standards
- Consider how to leverage high performers’ influence positively rather than excusing them from requirements
Drawing the Line on Accountability
Throughout our session, the leadership team wrestled with the tension between showing empathy and maintaining accountability. One leader summarized this challenge well when discussing salespeople who ask for exceptions: “I understand that needed to get to the sales meeting and close the deal, but could you have planned better to be at our meeting that was scheduled months ago?”
The conversation revealed how easily accountability erodes when we accommodate every request because of someone else’s lack of organizational skills or prioritization. What starts as a single exception quickly becomes a pattern, then an expectation. While showing understanding is important, we recognized that sometimes leaders need to create moments of productive discomfort – situations where team members feel the consequences of poor planning or misaligned priorities.
We discussed how excuses often mask deeper issues. When someone says, “I’m behind on my numbers, so I need to skip training,” they’re revealing a fundamental misunderstanding about how training contributes to performance improvement. I asked this question: “What are the current performance outcomes of those who are not completing their assigned training program?” My very first coach told me “How you do anything is how you do everything.” As leaders, we have to look for the parallel patterns to uncover the struggling performers.
Another powerful insight emerged around desperation. Sales professionals who feel behind will often surrender boundaries in an attempt to catch up. However, this approach typically compounds the problem, creating a downward spiral of reactivity rather than strategic improvement. The most successful performers actually maintain stronger boundaries, which paradoxically leads to greater respect from clients and better results.
The consensus was that each must put their own stake in the ground regarding expectations. Without consequences, team members won’t prioritize important activities like training or prospecting. As one leader put it, “Sometimes people have to learn by consequences.”
What Leaders Can Do:
Balancing empathy with accountability requires clear boundaries, consistent follow-through, and a willingness to have tough conversations. Here’s how leaders can take a stand without sacrificing trust:
- Establish clear consequences for missing requirements
- Create a formalized process for requesting exceptions in advance
- Train team members on professional boundary-setting with clients
- Coach around the deeper issue when someone constantly seeks exceptions
- Use real examples to demonstrate how high performers maintain boundaries with clients and their time
The Training-Coaching Connection
Perhaps the most valuable insight concerned the relationship between training and coaching. I emphasized to the leadership team: “If you are not coaching around the training, the training will not stick.” Our discussion highlighted that without consistent follow-up coaching, approximately 80% of training content is lost within a month.
This insight resonated deeply as we examined our current approach. Despite investing in a robust training program, they struggled with uneven implementation. The pattern was undeniable: team members would attend sessions, express enthusiasm about the content, but then revert to previous habits within days. Without deliberate reinforcement, even the most impactful learning experiences quickly faded into the background of daily pressures.
Many leaders operated under a “once and done” mindset – assuming that exposure to information would automatically translate into behavior change. This fundamental misunderstanding ignores the gap between knowledge and application. Teams don’t struggle because they don’t know what to do; they struggle because consistently doing it under real-world pressure requires ongoing support and accountability.
The conversation shifted when we explored the distinction between transactional and transformational leadership. Transactional leadership focuses primarily on monitoring activities and outcomes – checking boxes that someone completed required training and hit their numbers. Transformational leadership, by contrast, engages with how team members apply what they’ve learned and helps them navigate obstacles to implementation. The difference is profound: one approach manages compliance while the other builds capability.
This distinction proved especially relevant when considering high performers. Even veteran team members benefit from coaching conversations where they articulate what they’re learning and how they plan to implement it. When I shared that I rise at 5am to study for my graduate program before beginning my workday, it sparked a discussion about priorities and boundaries.
One powerful analogy emerged: I asked the leaders if they’ve ever waited months for a doctor’s appointment and whether they would cancel that appointment for a client meeting. The consensus was clear – some commitments are non-negotiable precisely because they’re important. Training deserves this same level of commitment. As one leader noted, if something truly matters, you find a way to honor it regardless of competing demands. This is the mindset we must model as leaders.
Effective leaders create a continuous improvement loop: train, observe behavior, coach, and provide feedback. This cycle transforms isolated learning events into sustained performance improvement. It requires shifting from transactional leadership (focused solely on numbers and activities) to transformational leadership (centered on development and growth).
What Leaders Can Do:
To make training investments deliver lasting value, integrate coaching as an essential part of your leadership approach:
- Schedule regular one-on-one sessions specifically focused on training implementation
- Ask team members to teach back what they’ve learned from training
- Have team members identify specific client situations where training concepts apply
- Create a simple tracking system connecting training concepts to performance metrics
- Implement peer coaching where team members hold each other accountable
Leveraging High Performers as Role Models
We recognized that getting high performers to model desired behaviors creates a powerful ripple effect throughout the organization. One leader observed that most high performers “want to leave a legacy” and suggested “tapping into that emotional piece” when asking them to participate in activities that might seem unnecessary for their level of expertise.
Turning training into lasting behavior change takes more than a one-time session. Instead, it takes intentional, ongoing coaching. Here are practical ways leaders can reinforce learning and drive real impact:
What Leaders Can Do:
- Create opportunities for high performers to mentor others on the team
- Ask top performers to share their learning processes and insights from training
- Frame participation as leadership development rather than just another requirement
- Recognize and celebrate when high performers model the right behaviors
- Create a “legacy project” for top performers to share their expertise formally
Leveraging High Performers as Role Models
We recognized that getting high performers to model desired behaviors creates a powerful ripple effect throughout the organization. One leader observed that most high performers “want to leave a legacy” and suggested “tapping into that emotional piece” when asking them to participate in activities that might seem unnecessary for their level of expertise.
This insight shifted our perspective on how we engage top talent. Rather than viewing training requirements as something high performers should be exempted from, we began to see these activities as opportunities for them to amplify their impact across the organization. The conversation revealed how powerful cultural messages are sent when a recognized top performer fully engages in training and development.
We explored the psychology behind this dynamic. When a respected veteran participates enthusiastically in training – despite “already knowing” the content – it sends a powerful message that continuous improvement matters regardless of performance level. I emphasized, “A true high performer is someone who’s willing to always be learning the next new thing.” This mindset distinction separates those who achieve temporary success from those who sustain excellence.
An interesting analogy emerged during our discussion – the “firstborn child” effect. Many leaders in the room could relate to being the eldest child in their family, expected to set an example for younger siblings. While this responsibility sometimes felt burdensome (“Why do I have to set the example all the time?”), it ultimately shaped leadership habits that served them well. Similarly, high performers might initially resist the added responsibility of modeling behaviors, but ultimately benefit from the expanded influence.
The discussion revealed how differently we needed to frame participation for these individuals. Rather than positioning prospecting or training as something they need for themselves, we should emphasize how their participation elevates others. One leader shared how they communicated this to a top performer: “I need you to be the leader that I know you can be,” appealing directly to their desire to leave a positive mark on the organization.
Most importantly, we acknowledged that high performers are watching our behavior as leaders. If we turn our cameras off during a meeting or skip a training session, we can’t expect different behavior from even our most committed team members.
What Leaders Can Do:
Harnessing the influence of high performers requires intentional leadership that appeals to their desire for impact beyond individual results. When you engage these team members as cultural ambassadors rather than just top producers, their influence creates a multiplier effect:
- Create opportunities for high performers to mentor others on the team
- Ask top performers to share their learning processes and insights from training
- Frame participation as leadership development rather than just another requirement
- Recognize and celebrate when high performers model the right behaviors
- Create a “legacy project” for top performers to share their expertise formally
ROI-Focused Decision Making
A final key lesson involved teaching team members to evaluate activities based on return on investment. Our discussion revealed how easily time-intensive activities with unclear outcomes can consume any professional’s schedule, particularly networking events.
We observed a troubling pattern: team members would routinely invest significant time in activities without clear objectives or measured results. For example, they viewed networking as an obligation rather than a strategic choice. When asked what specific outcomes they expected from these events, many couldn’t articulate concrete goals beyond “showing up” or “being visible.”
The time investment extended beyond just the event itself. Travel time, preparation, and the natural tendency to use the event as justification for writing off additional productive hours created what one leader described as a “time suck” that repeated weekly. This pattern affected performance, especially among developing team members who most needed to master fundamental selling skills.
More concerning was how rarely anyone questioned the ROI of these activities. Team members hesitated to reschedule even when it made business sense, and many failed to establish any metrics for what constituted a successful outcome from their time investment.
By focusing on outcomes rather than activities, we help our teams make better decisions about where to invest their time and energy. The solution isn’t necessarily eliminating networking or client events, but rather approaching them with clear objectives and measurable targets.
What Leaders Can Do:
Converting this insight into practice requires giving your team concrete tools to evaluate their time investments before committing to them:
- Create a simple ROI calculation tool for evaluating time investments
- Require pre-planning documents for networking events with specific targets
- Implement post-event debriefs focusing on outcomes, not just activities
- Track long-term results from various prospecting methods to identify what truly works
- Coach team members to set clear, measurable objectives before any time-intensive activity
Building Effective Onboarding
Our discussion revealed significant gaps in onboarding processes. What typically happens is troubling: new sales representatives complete basic orientation and are immediately pushed into networking events and client-facing activities before they’ve mastered fundamental skills (like product knowledge). As one leader noted in our session, “We dump so much on our reps… the training, and then immediately, you gotta be in network groups and immediately you should be here. We don’t teach them the basics.”
This rushed approach creates multiple problems. New team members feel overwhelmed and develop haphazard habits rather than sound professional practices. They often fail to establish core prospecting skills like effective cold calling, email outreach, and qualification techniques. Instead, they become dependent on networking events that provide social comfort but questionable ROI. When they inevitably struggle, they blame external factors rather than recognizing fundamental skill gaps.
Most troubling is the pattern one leader identified: “We’ve probably lacked in managing their time from the get-go.” to which I replied “You cannot manage someone else’s time.” Without structured development, new hires adopt whatever behaviors appear easiest or most comfortable, creating habits that become increasingly difficult to correct later. Another leader observed that merely asking if someone had scheduled prospecting and training time revealed they hadn’t; they simply weren’t managing their calendars effectively from day one.
The consequences ripple beyond the individual. Poorly prepared representatives damage client relationships, require excessive management attention, and model ineffective behaviors for subsequent hires. All of this stems from rushing people into the field before they’ve demonstrated foundational competence.
What Leaders Can Do:
Breaking this cycle requires a fundamental redesign of how we introduce new team members to their roles. Rather than rushing them into visibility, we must ensure they’re building from a solid foundation:
- Create a progressive onboarding system with skill mastery requirements
- Implement skill verification before allowing independent client interaction
- Pair new team members with experienced mentors for early client interactions
- Record and analyze early prospecting efforts for coaching opportunities
- Establish clear milestones that must be achieved before broadening activities
Finding the Balance
Effective leadership requires balancing accountability with support, consistency with situational awareness, and activities with outcomes. As one leader insightfully summarized: “Coaching is riding that line of micromanagement, but not crossing that line.” Finding this balance is the art of leadership that transforms both performance and culture.
From Insight to Action
The gap between knowing and doing is where most leadership efforts fall short. We recognize the need for accountability, understand the importance of coaching, and see the impact of clarity. Translating these insights into daily practice is where real leadership happens.
I challenge you to select just three actions from this article that resonate most strongly with your current leadership challenges. Implement them deliberately over the next 30 days. Document what changes you observe in your team’s behavior, engagement, and performance.
Remember that sustainable change happens through consistent application rather than dramatic overhauls. The small, daily decisions you make about expectations, exceptions, and engagement will ultimately define your leadership legacy far more than any grand initiative.
Your team is watching not just what you say about accountability, but how you model it yourself. When you commit to these practices, you’re sending a powerful message about what truly matters in your organization.
What will your first step be tomorrow?
Need help coaching your leadership team to higher performance?
Let’s talk about how I can support your managers in setting clear expectations, holding people accountable, and driving ROI-based decisions, without micromanaging. Email me at gina@ginatrimarco.com.
